18 kids and counting...an ode to the true insanity of Michelle Duggar

My last two nights could not have been any different from each other. Last night was bad. I have been trying to sugar coat it for myself and others, but let's face it...last night made me question what in the world I'm doing in the middle of Guatemala spending all my time with children. It also made me seriously contemplate the idea the reproducing might be a no go. Last night all the staff here had a dinner party to give them a break...an idea that we greatly support...in theory. We each went back to our respective houses after dinner to be the adult presence in the parents' absence. Again in theory, the kids were going to be sleeping the whole time so this should have been a piece of cake. False.

When I got there all 19 (yes, we've added one) were in bed...sleeping...allegedly. Veronica loudly said, "Emily is here to watch you and she's going to write down the names of any of you who get out of bed." I didn't realize that would involve me earning an honorary degree in notation. Seriously, the Qumran scribes didn't write this much in a night. Literally from the moment the door closed, absolute chaos ensued. They don't listen to me at all. For three straight hours they screamed, ran around the house, and beat the living daylights out of each other. At first I threatened them with "apuntando" (taking down their names) but that soon became a joke since I had written a paragraph about practically all of them. Then I resorted to raising my voice and making frequent visits to their rooms. Also a fail. At one point a mattress (yes, an entire mattress) flew out of the boys' door and hit me. Seriously, these kids are supposed to be six years old...I don't know what they are feeding them to make them capable of projecting mattresses at their babysitters. Finally, I tried outright emotional manipulation. I calmly explained that Jesus says we are supposed to love each other and hitting does not qualify as one of the 5 love languages (no, not even under Physical Touch). Then I asked them why they disobey me when I like them so much. That earned me a 4 second pause in the mayhem and then it was back to the WWF ring. The last hour consisted of me sitting dejectedly on the couch while they tried to kill each other and made fun of me as I looked perpetually out the window, praying that someone would come to my rescue. Fail.

To summarize an evening of pure terror, I give you the injury tally:

1 bloody mouth

1 swollen eye (due to a belt whipping from another boy)

1 welt on the lower back (because another boy took a board out of his bed and dropped it on this boy...seriously???)

1 upset stomach

1 very upset Emily

However, the bright spot in all of this (and in most situations I encounter here) was the sweet little girl that I spend my mornings with. In the middle of the chaos she called me into the girls' room. She got out of her bed and came over to hug me and said, "Buenas noches Emily. Que los ángeles te protegan." (Good night Emily. I pray that the angels protect you.) Then she asked me for "un beso" and I bent down and let her give me a kiss. All the other girls jumped up to hug me goodnight and then I sent them back to their beds. She is just the best.

Tonight was completely the opposite of last night. At the end of dinner the power went out. Guatemala is dark. We found our flashlights, headlamps, and Ashley's glow sticks and had ourselves a power outage party. A man from the other group bought us all ice cream and we played "fruit" (our adaptation on spoons which involves using the wooden fruit centerpieces as the spoons so we don't have to wash more dishes). We also had a glow stick photo shoot, as you'll see below. Tonight was a much needed forced time of rest and fun after a week (hard to believe we've only been here one week!) of intensity. Sometimes when I'm with the kids it's hard to remember that they haven't had normal childhoods. They seem so well cared for here that it's hard to remember that they've recently been in the street or in situations where their authority members abused them. So, tonight, I give you more pictures of them to remind everyone (mostly myself) that they are indeed precious. Also, here are some pictures of our darkness party:)

Welcome to World Cup season in Latin America!! Brazil won today, which meant that every single person here felt the need to personally congratulate Cressia on her country's achievement

Glow sticks...it says, "Qué Wow!" which basically means Wow, is a made up phrase that Lauren Harlow has formed a special attachment to, and has become one of our team's favorite catchphrases

And this is what a glow stick dance party looks like when you leave your shutter open! Goodnight!